In my business, letting go is almost obsolete. We doctors love to hang on to our patient... no matter what. I guess doctors can't be seen giving up, because if we do, what chances would the patient have?
2 months back, RP was admitted here for a palliative surgery. He has a complex heart condition and we don't expect him to have live long. But because he is so blue, we agreed to do a surgery that will make him less blue, hopefully. But, he ran into some complication and the surgery took more then 6 hours. While he was in ICU, his heart gave up and CPR performed on him for almost 90 minutes... the doctors wouldn't and couldn't give up. But then due to the prolong lack of oxygen to his brain, RP ended up with severe brain damage that left him in a vegetative state.
This brings me to question about the need to hold on to patients. How far should we go as a doctor or even a medical practitioner, to save a person life? Very far I hope.....to infinity and beyond!!!!! But then again, if we would have known that in saving his life, we would have not improve his quality of life or even made it worst.... would we still do it? But how could we have known?
Well, RP lived on for another month. During this time we sat down with the parents countless of time explaining that their son would never talk, walk or even grow up like a normal child. After the hundredth time, the father finally said that this is it for RP. He understood and doesn't want anything else to be done for his son. True enough, a week later RP collapsed quietly in Anggerik, while his mother was downstairs, waiting for her father in surgery.
As a doctor, my natural instinct was to start CPR, but I know better. The best thing for RP at that moment was to let him go in peace. It was not that difficult.... told myself over and over again, this is what is best for him. God has better plan... I have to believe in that.
But sometimes I think letting go takes more courage then holding on....
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